Do's & Don'ts

Wedding Reception Music Do's and Don'ts

Every couple has their own ideas on what makes great reception music. Here are a few suggested dos and don'ts to make sure your reception entertainment keeps your guests' feet tapping and not heading for the exit.

Do:

See your wedding band live. They might give you a CD or video, but to get a real feel for the way they work the crowd you'll have to see them in action for yourself. If you are relying on a demo CD, make sure the musicians on the recording are the same ones that will be attending your reception.
Choose specific songs for significant parts of your reception. Having particular song for your cake cutting, and all of the special dances such as the first dance, the father daughter dance, and the mother son dance, will add structure to your reception. Make sure your band knows about your chosen tunes and ask them to announce the individual events.
Plan for breaks. Your band will need to take breaks during their sets, so make sure you find out how many they will take and for how long. You won't want your guests to be left in silence so check whether you need to provide a compilation CD to cover breaks, or whether they will put something suitable on

Don't:

Leave it until the last minute to book your band. Good quality wedding entertainers will get booked up around a year in advance, especially during high wedding season. As soon as you've paid a deposit for the venue, check out what is possible and start your DJ search.

Give your band a "set in stone" play list. You are hiring them because they are a great band and is capable of reading the crowd and keeping the party moving. Asking them to stick to your play list will limit their creativity and will be a waste of your hard earned money. That said, giving your band a list of songs you'd love to hear, as well as a do not play list, is never a bad idea and will give them an idea of your musical tastes.

Budget

Budget enough to get the very best. Most couples pay from $60 to $150 per guest for food and yet they try to hire a band for around $7.50 per guest (based upon 300 guests). This is not very wise since the food will not hold everyone's attention for 3 or 4 hours like a band will. Ask yourself this...

The band has to pay for thousands of dollars of musical instruments, P.A., lighting, formal wear, etc., office expenses, technical personnel, and the musicians themselves, right? How professional can a band possibly be if they are willing to play at your reception for one-tenth of what the food is costing you?

I'm often amazed at how low a client's entertainment budget is in comparison to food and the photographer. Many photographers today are charging $5,000 up to $10,000, and even that is still a fraction of what the food costs per guests. Let's face it, the guests will eat three more meals the next day. In 6 months, they won't have a clue what kind of food you served them at the reception. But they will remember whether or not your reception was a ton of fun. And what kind of photos will the $5,000-$10,000 photographer snap at the reception? Will they be pictures of guests eating dinner or having a blast on the dance floor? Who creates the party? Will the reception end when the food is eaten and the photos are taken? Let's face it! The ultimate success of your reception is riding on the entertainment.

The ultimate wedding reception band will be a variety band consisting of regular members (the permanent band). But the main reason that your guests will lose interest in your band can boil down to one major fact. I have seen this hold true for many years as we refined the sound of Eclipse Live band.

If the band is well rehearsed and plays each song as close to the original arrangement as possible, your guests will tend to enjoy themselves more and stay longer. It is easier for your guests to identify the songs when they sound like the original, complete with background vocals and all. If they recognize the songs, they can sing along, hum, tap their toes, or participate however they wish. We have had people come to us on break and comment about how the songs were so mixed up they had no idea what we might do next and that each unique style sounded like a different band entirely. Moving from rock to country should be very obvious but I have heard bands who somehow manage to make a country song sound like a jazz standard.

Of course it is always a good idea to see the band "live", if possible. This is not always possible due to timing, and many events are closed to outsiders. Weigh the demo CD against the song list and see if they are really a variety band or just a band that has a variety song list. If you do see the band "live" be careful not to judge them strictly based upon whether the dance floor is full. For one thing, even the best entertainers can encounter a "dead" crowd. And earlier in the evening the band will most likely be playing "dinner music" and the guests will be catching up on things with friends or relatives. Some crowds, for religious reasons among others, may just enjoy listening to the band. Try to determine whether it's the band that is boring or the crowd. Look for toe tapping, head bobbing, etc. and decide if the band sounds good to you. Would you be inclined to dance if it were your event? The best time to see the band is about halfway into the reception when all the visiting is over and the guests are ready to have a party.

Most good variety bands book 8 months to one year in advance so don't wait until the last minute to go looking. Many book on a first-come-first-served basis too, so don't tarry too long making a decision or you may end up looking again and again and then end up with a lesser quality act for perhaps the most important day of your life.

I hope you have found this article helpful. Please feel free to contact me if you have any questions.

No doubt about it: Music can make or break a wedding celebration. It's the heart and soul of a reception and can send your guests home with happy feet -- or pained grimaces! The fact that you want to hire a talented band or fleet-fingered DJ is a given. Finding one is a matter of polling friends, surfing online, shopping around with fine-tuned ears, and making a move quickly. What type of entertainment suits your personal taste, budget, space allowances, guest demographics, and killer dance moves best? Keep an open mind, and consider these issues to start your search.

Vibe

The type of music you choose can set the tone of your wedding and solidify a theme. And remember, it's the thing people most often remember. Think about what musical genre best reflects your personalities and inspires the ambience you want to create: Groovy funk or subdued string quartet? Swanky swing or kick-off-your-shoes-and-sweat zydeco? The way the music is delivered -- by live band or DJ -- also affects the ambience. The type of music you choose may dictate the choice too.

Variety

Are you a little bit country, while he's a little bit rock and roll? Regardless of whether you choose a band or DJ, be sure they play slow and fast songs, and old and new tunes to encourage different sets of guests to hit the dance floor.

Budget

In the price war, DJs generally cost less, and prices vary depending on equipment requests and whether it's a weekday or a weekend. A 12-piece band, for example, will generally be more expensive than a DJ, since there are more people to pay. (There are always exceptions; celebrity DJs can be just as expensive as live bands.) Band prices vary by the number of musicians, the amount of time you want them to play for, day of the week, and what time of year it is.

Space

Don't get your heart set on an 8-piece salsa band before you check whether the reception site has any restrictions on the number of musicians and pieces of equipment you may bring in, and whether there are any electrical power supply or noise limitations.

Band? or...

There's nothing like a live wedding band to get a crowd stoked and create a sense of sophistication. Music groups can synergize with the tone of your wedding and almost any niche theme. A good bandleader will play the master of ceremonies at your reception if you want him to interact with folks on the dance floor, pay attention to the "feel" of the room, and select music accordingly.

Live music is, well, live. You and your guests will experience the pleasure of a performance. Anything can happen to raise the excitement level, from an infectious horn-section interlude to a moving solo. What do you think the most important element of the Wedding Reception is...

The food? - 846 votes (25%)

The photographer/videographer? - 218 votes (6%)

THE ENTERTAINMENT? - 1538 votes (46%)

The flowers/decorations? - 188 votes (5%)

The location? - 486 votes (14%)

MUSIC CAN MAKE OR BREAK YOUR WEDDING! Everyone's heard that famous saying before, but when it comes down to decision time, how many brides actually throw their common sense out the window to save a couple of hundred bucks? Brides seldom hear complaints about the terrible or "cheap DJ" they hired...simply because her friends and relatives don't want to insult her or be rude.

Before you begin entertainment shopping, you need to be honest with yourself. Do you want to IMPRESS your guests? Or, just give them a human jukebox? In most cases, YOU WILL GET EXACTLY WHAT YOU PAY FOR. Never look at your purchase of entertainment like the purchase of a tangible item like food or the rental cost of a hall. When it comes to quality entertainment, there is little room for bargain shopping. Surveys show that 2 out of 3 guests agree that music can make or break the event.